Positive Aging When I mentioned to my son that I was writing an article on Positive Aging, he laughed. It’s an oxymoron, no? Common wisdom: Aging means we’re falling apart, our bodies are breaking down, aches and pains increasing, minds atrophying, our family and friends are dying and, to top it all, what do we […]
Author: KanePhelps
Absence Makes the Heart Grow Fonder
This past week I left my beautiful wife and headed north to “Sacred Circle Dance Camp” in a redwood forest south of Santa Cruz. It was a glorious week, filled with joyful and meditative dance, in community with like minded souls. I also led a Council session for fellow dancers, great sharing from the heart. […]
Conscious Partnering
Conscious partnering means putting relationships first. It implies a cultural shift away from “me first” and towards honoring “otherness”. It requires treating “other” as a respected “thou” rather than an “it”. It insists on building a culture that supports relationships. The reward: Conscious partnering has been proven to: Reduce violence, addiction, divorce, & poverty. Conscious partnering considers the couple […]
Four Facts of Healthy, Loving, Relationships
Many of us have experienced romantic “falling in love” love. Consequently, many of us have experienced the bittersweet taste of the bloom fading off the rose. Many fall into the trap of thinking that the initial bloom is what defines true love. Just recently, I attended a “Couples Conference” attended by hundreds of therapists. I […]
What is “self compassion”?
Self compassion is a fierce and challenging practice but one that can bring extraordinary sense of fulfillment and personal growth. Without it, we cannot truly practice compassion to others who are suffering around us. The unlived life is a plague upon our culture. Extraordinary suffering accrues when we ignore our bodies and our inner selves, […]
5 Keys to Change Habits
Many of us start the New Year with resolutions to change habits. Come March many of those resolutions have bit the dust. Here are 5 keys to help you change bad habits based on the recently published book “The Power of Habit” by Charles Duhigg: Write down a clear statement of intention and include a […]
Zen and Psychotherapy
At their core, both psychotherapy and zen are about “healing hungry hearts” and the alleviation of suffering. There are three common core practices: Mindfulness – Mindfulness was not invented by Jon Cabot-Zinn. The Buddha spoke of sitting quietly, turning your attention inward and embracing each moment over 4,000 years ago. Self Compassion – Many of […]